Poltergeist Past

It was March of 2003. I was getting over "the girl that was the one" dumping me in October, living with friends, etc etc etc. I was forced to give a 2 week notice to my employer as my "last month" of school was going to demand all of my time. I was in a musical, had finals, and final projects. All that blended together made the concept of a gf very distasteful to me. I did know several cute girls from work, but I had a rule about that. No relations with girls from work, school, or social activites I frequented. This pretty much eliminated my entire dating pool. Just fine with me. I decided to tank this rule with a girl I knew from work. It was just supposed to be a one night thing. It was during that one night thing, that my failure of a proper screening process started to bite me in the ass. Apparently, she was engaged and after this boy went into the military she was devastated and did nothing with other boys until me. She fell "in love". Considering the sex actually was pretty good, I was fine with that to a certain degree. Then the other boys came. It was cool that she was dating again. What wasn't cool was the fact that she cheated on like 4 of those boys with me. Again...sex was good...no cares from the me camp. The spring wore on into summer. I was having sex with her a lot. Then she started having sex with LOTS of other boys. I backed away. She was getting too wild for me. It was then I realized I may have fallen for her. It seemed now the roles were reversed. I was interested in a relationship and she just wanted sex. Renaissance Festival distracted me from her quite a bit, but after that, I did everything to make her happy. I was tearing myself up doing it too. My emotional state was a mess. Finally, in December, I cut her out of my life. I realized she was causing me too much harm. I was wrecked. Holiday stress and this drove me into a very very deep depression. That depression made me reflect on 2003 and I saw all the chaos and pain I sowed. (There are details that do not directly pertain to her omitted for time.) I vowed 2004 to rebuild. It was in 2004 that she and I reconciled a bit. We were on friendly terms. It was while I was dating a girl that graduated with me in 2004 that she called me and told me how much she missed fucking me and she wanted to do it again. I politely declined and stupidly told my gf. That girl now despises her. All of these reasons are covered up by the bravado of the superficial reason of her getting chunky. This girl was very very bad for me. I don't know if she is really any good for me now...but still she haunts my mind...and my heart.